Teehee...

I giggle a bit every time my computer tells me, "Your touchpad/pointing stick has been disabled, due to another device being detected in the area." It's a wonderful start to every workday.

Love,
Katie

Poop Thoughts

Poop thoughts... courtesy of me and Brad. If you're already offended, don't read the rest.

Have you ever taken a poop so big that it makes you swear (re-swear, really) that you'll never have butt sex?

I love taking poops at work. Nothing like getting paid to poop.

Love,
Katie

Wanderings...

So last night I got a good night's sleep, finally. The combination of a mild coke zero addiction, daylight's savings, and discovering that Modern Family is GENIUS (once you get past the pilot) has led to several nights of insufficient sleep. Anyway, you'd think that I would have been out like a log, but it turns out my unconscious self had just been waiting to come out and play.

First of all, I woke up in the midst of a thought, which happened to be: "The tangerine is too far away this time." Where was the tangerine last time? Why did it move? What was happening that necessitated it being a certain distance from me? Also... I haven't eaten or even seen a tangerine in ages... so where did that come from?

As soon as that thought (and the subsequent questions that arose) had passed I realized that I had a song playing in my head. Which song? THIS ONE Do you know this song?? Apparently, I do. Turns out I have it on iTunes. I finally remembered that I had purchased it because I thought Jason Castro was awkward/adorable/hot and deserving of a little support. Perhaps my subconscious had created a scenario in which Jason Castro and I were falling in love again, and it turns out that the tangerine we both reached for  was too far away during our reenactment. With the tangerine being too far away, he reached it before I did, and we didn't have that brushing of hands that led to our whirlwind romance. DAMN YOU JASON CASTRO AND YOUR LONG, MAN ARMS!!! I don't mean it. Let's just move the tangerine, and try this again. 


Anyway, I got over the initial confusion, double-clicked the song on my computer, and hopped in the shower while singing along. Then, out of nowhere, I get this panic-stricken thought. KATIE, YOU FORGOT TO MESSAGE BEN BACK!!! I stood there under the water trying to remember if he had texted or Facebook messaged me, when I realized that he had done neither. Ben most certainly hadn't messaged me at all. So, then I start thinking: perhaps while I was fuming in my frustration about the tangerine thwarting my efforts to fall in love with Jason Castro again, I received a cryptic message from Ben... with just enough hope behind it to make me think that falling in love with Jason might not be the best idea. As I was waking up, subconscious Katie was rocking back and forth on the ground near the fruit stand, muttering to a confused Jason: "The tangerine is too far away this time... The tangerine is too far away this time... The tangerine is too far away this time..." As if the distance of the tangerine from me, and the timing of my text message, were omens of the disastrous effects of brushing hands with the man I thought I loved.

Which begs the question... why can't subconscious Katie get a break??

Love,
Katie

In the unlikely case...

That you haven't had this blog mentioned to you yet...

Hyperbole and a Half

The amazing Allie Brosh really has put the last nail in the coffin that is my aspirations of being a relevant blogger. Not that I was really serious about it... I mean, I kinda talk about myself, put up links, and just have a ton of photos of awesome cupcakes... but this girl would sweep the floor with anything I could create.

Brad, Kel, and I have all become hooked (Rach... you too??). We're friends with Spaghatta Nadle on Facebook, we read the posts during breaks between projects at work in order to keep our sanity (HEY... you try editing 300 pages of powerpoint in one sitting... okay??!!), and we discuss the fact that pie really IS better than cake. Now that I come to think of it... I'd like to debate her on pie v. cupcakes, because we all know I could kick ass in that debate. I won't win on humor or artistic representation, but when it comes to mastery of rhetoric and reason, I. WILL. WIN.

Anyhoodle, since the last time I posted something I wanted led to me getting said wanted item... I'm going to do it again. I want this, in celebration of my becoming a functioning member of adult society. Decide amongst yourselves as to who will get it for me.

I WANT

Love,
Katie

Google image adventure...

So, my feet happen to smell like this right now:

I don't know why. It just happened... but it got me thinking that maybe I could find a photo of a foot with butter on it. Sadly, that didn't turn out to be easy, since tons of foot lotions out there happen to be made with shea butter... sigh. So, I tried typing "foot+butter" into google. That's how I found this:

Apparently, some people really can't do without having the ability to turn a stick of butter into a 10-foot-long ribbon. According to the site, it will revolutionize your butter experience. What I think will truly revolutionize your butter experience, however, is this:

Butter Superman will save you one dry serving of mashed potatoes at a time!!! Or perhaps one piece of toast at a time... In which case, he'll need to use the next item on the list... found when I tried to google "foot+stick+butter." (Unless his butter fingers can regenerate... Hmmm...)

Not going to lie... I'm kind of intrigued by this product, as the butter can be spread evenly and accurately across the extent of your toast. It also makes you feel like you're back in kindergarten and this time it's totally okay if you eat the glue stick!!!

I feel like I might be able to find what I was originally looking for by researching foot fetishes... but we all know how well that's going to go...

Love,

Katie

HAPPY ST. PATTY'S!!!

Oh, for the love of all things delicious!!!! GREEN velvet cupcakes!!! I MUST FIND THESE TODAY!!!

As Jenny says: "Put a little Irish in you!"

Happy St. Patrick's Day!
Katie

My New Girl Crush

Female Love of My Life

I know I'm behind on this trend, but I am now IN LOVE with Gabby Sidibe. Girl is fantastic!!! What caused my inevitable, albeit belated conversion?? The two videos featured on the link above.

LOVE LOVE LOVE!!!
Katie